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Antiquated but Awesome Words You Need to Use Right Now

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By Devon Brown

Have you ever wished there was a word to describe that delicious smell after rain falls? Actually there is! The English language is many centuries old, and like clothes, words fall in and out of fashion. After some digging, we’ve found a few gems ready to make a come back.

If you’re looking for modern day help on your next paper, our spell checker is at your service.

Ultracrepidarian

Noun

They love to hear their own voices even more than being right. An ultracrepidarian is person who shares an opinion on topics they know nothing about.

Example:

Raul is the ultimate ultracrepidarian. He is totally comfortable arguing about European politics even though he knows nothing about them.  

Crapulence

Noun

The phrase “to feel crappy” takes on a whole new level of depth and sophistication when it’s converted to crapulence which describes the feeling of discomfort after drinking or eating too much.

Example:

There is nothing like a good game of touch football to work off post-Thanksgiving crapulence.

Fudgel

Verb

Stuck at your desk with nothing to do? Looks like you’ll have to fudgel, which means pretend to work without actually doing anything.

Example:

Sometimes I feel like it is actually easier to do work than to fudgel all day.

Groak

Verb

If one minute you’re enjoying a tasty treat on your own and the next you’ve given half away, you’ve probably been groaked. It’s when someone silently watches you eat in the hope that you’ll share.

Example:

My dog can groak under the dinner table for hours until he is fed a treat.

Petrichor

Noun

The 1960’s are hardly ancient times, but when you find a word that describes that yummy smell of fresh rain on dry soil, it begs to be shared.

Example:

The petrichor in the air more than made up for our shoes getting wet on our walk home.

Callipygian

Adjective

Admiration for a beautiful booty is not a modern invention. Callipygian is an old school, circa 1600, adjective that describes a beautiful butt.

Example:

Her callipygian posterior made an otherwise ugly skirt look very fashionable.

Kench

Verb

When a uncontrollable laugh bursts from your face, you can call on the Middle English word kench to describe the experience.

Example:

Vanessa knew the text message would be funny, but not so hilarious that she would kench in church.

Schadenfreude

Noun

We have the Germans to thank for this word that describes the pleasure taken from the misfortune of others.

Example:

Everytime Lori had a difficult day, her boyfriend couldn’t hide his schadenfreude so she had to break up with him.

Scurrilous

Adjective

Gossip doesn’t have to be true to do damage. With French and Latin roots, scurrilous is a word that describes lies designed to damage a reputation.

Example:

Maxwell would have made a great class president, but scurrilous rumors about his year abroad made it impossible to electhim.


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